When you get married it is never to get divorced, however, things do happen and before you know it you’re evaluating your relationship in such a way that you start to check for any of these 5 Signs You Maybe Headed To Divorce.
Society has made divorce such an ugly word and with passed divorces, people have drag each other through the mud because of hurt and pain and has increasingly made the word and the act so dreaded. But before you get to actually filing for divorce, how do you know you are headed to the big “D”. This decision must never be taken lightly, all actions must be taken in order to avoid separating especially when children are involved. Are you heading for divorce? After 11 years of marriage, I had to ask myself that hard question. continue reading to see if you are heading for the big “D”, D for Divorce.
1. No Respect is Disrespect
Contrary to popular belief, at least based on my experience, respect is way more important than love and affection. Don’t already debunk this idea. After some years of marriage, affection and love come and go but true, untarnished respect for each other’s, time, efforts, needs, individuality and quirks will make it much easier to have a longer comfortable relationship. Lack of respect breathes contempt and as such unhappiness.
2. Keeping Secrets is bad for any relationship
This should be a no-brainer, right? Well, it’s not there are so many couples who keep secrets. Even if it’s just telling each other how you truly feel. Look at it this way, if you have to keep what you’re doing a secret from your spouse, out of fear they may be hurt, then that’s definitely a something you should not do and a secret you should not want to create. Not speaking how you truly feel too can cause misunderstanding which leads to inaccurate decisions on both ends.
3. Constant Arguments
There is such a thing as a healthy argument. Disagreements are inevitable, now how you deal with arguments when the dust settles can save your relationship or end it. Constant arguments do not give anyone involved a chance to get over one issue before a next one arises. The constant bickering will sure lead to divorce if there is no solution to the issues being argued about. Talk it out, don’t fight it out. If you cannot talk amicably, get a mediator.
4. Lack of Trust is heartbreaking
Wow! This is major! Every relationship starts off with 100% trust level, right? After years together this level dwindles because of acts done by each party. Huge acts like infidelities and unreliability can cause major issues within a relationship. No one wants to be in a relationship where they are second-guessing their sanity with regards to their spouse’s actions. Some of those major acts that can cause a lack of trust can be worked out but what’s for sure, no trust in a relationship will have you thinking about divorce.
5. Lack of Romance, Intimacy or Affection
Have you ever heard of love languages? Well, it is accurate for the most part, most people have inner needs within a relationship that will affect how they communicate or function. For some individuals the need for romance and affection is major. That’s how they feel love and show their love. If this is what your partner or you need and is not getting, then this will cause major issues. I am sure you have heard of the main reasons why people break up, intimacy is one of those reasons.
Divorcing is not the end of the world it’s HUGE but with time everything can be dealt with or managed. If you find any of these signs in your marriage I suggest you get counselling. Psychologists are trained to pinpoint certain telltale signs and furnish you with the right tools to combat most if not all marital issues. Remember though you both have to want it to work
Disclaimer: I am not a counsellor, psychologist or any other Doctor. My views are those of experience in my own marriage and life experiences.